Mary and Frederik quash marriage rift rumours

[Countessa]

Author Trine Villemann on Youtube (in English)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xDj5aL0861w&NR=1

The interview seems staged (there's also one in Danish). Villemann says Mary has bad advisors but yet she is extraordinarily popular in Denmark. It looks like Ms. Villemann is the one with bad advisors for writing this book.

Then she says she has information that will bring down the 1500-year-old Danish Monarchy but refuses to reveal it. Marie's sex tape has already been exposed. Really, what else could there be? :laugh:

[princesslily]

I don't believe this. The media are just trying to do a Diana story because it sells.

[Elisevonblah]

I think that Mary is in a difficult position. There is a certain image we expect from royalty, but if these new princesses change too much to adapt to their new role, they are criticized heavily for it. We say that they have "lost themselves". I also think we tend to put those who marry into royalty through much heavier scrutiny, as if all royals have been angels in the past and anyone marrying in, who might have been human, is unacceptable. 

As for marriage rumors, I would have to take the word of others on this. I don't read any of the Scandinavian languages, so I am not up to date on the gossip, but what I do know is that it is not uncommon for couples, who were very much in love and very happy on their wedding day, to experience strife in their marriage, especially after the birth of children. There is an evolution that takes place when two become one and then four. I don't think we have a Diana and Charles situation here, but I would not be surprised if in the past three years of adapting to married life, royal life  and then family life, there have been some bumpy spots for Fred and Mary.

In some of the English interviews that Fred has done, I have often had the impression that he was slightly spoiled and stubborn and that he feels an unwanted burden as a CP. He didn't choose this life and I think he feels a bitterness at having to do the things he doesn't want to do. Mary on the other hand did choose this life and I think she faces her duties with enthusiasm, which I am sure could rub someone like Fred the wrong way and again cause strife.

[Kuei Fei]

I can't fathom why anyone seems to have an issue if someone who marries into royalty enjoys performing their duties and takes their role seriously. Fred is very unfair to Mary if she's enjoying her role and the duties that go along with it. He's pretty lucky, as are the Danes since they seem to have someone who takes seriously her role as future Queen. It's like these days that people marrying into royal families are expected to not enjoy their role.

[Lillianna]

What bothers the Danes is that it's not so much that she enjoys the role, but rather that she appears to spend a lot of time posing (where have we heard that before) and locating the cameras, rather than concentrating on the work she is supposed to be doing. Rather than growing into the role, which they were perfectly willing to give her time to do (after all, their first princess - Alexandra - did it splendidly, and with very little prior preparation), she appears to still be drifting in it, and overly obsessed with things that royals don't normally pay attention to, or aren't expected to. Still too many faux pas, after such a long time in the household. That's the underlying issue. I'm still hoping will grow into the role, but we shall see. As to Frederik, I gave up on him long ago.

[Kuei Fei]

I see, in other words she doesn't concentrate on just her guests or the event, but poses for the camera at all times. Does she speak the language fluently?

[moley]

I read some place That mary and Frederik are always over budget and all Mary like to do is shop for things.

[Kuei Fei]

No wonder the Danes are getting angry.

[buffym]

Mary has yet to find her niche- her charities are all over the board and she doesn't seem very relatable. Her personality has came out.

Mary and Frederik may be over budget but she recycle her clothes a lot.

[Countessa]

Frederik and Mary were recently out at a Tennis Match. This video is a bit curious. Frederik seems to ignore Mary and looks downright uncomfortable. There is little interaction between them. Even when Fred's cell phone rings, he ignores a curious Mary who is clearly wondering who it might be.

video: http://herognu.com/index.php?mod=main&top=0&parent=73&id=82

[Elisevonblah]

Perhaps they are having an off day? Perhaps the Marie scandal has put a lot of pressure and tension on them? Maybe the match was boring, they were tired from raising two small children and all they wanted was to go home and snuggle up with a good book? 

[Lillianna]

Kuei: No, she has improved somewhat, but people still think that her Danish is bordering on terrible, considering that she has the resources of the entire country at her fingertips, plus a Danish spouse. But then again, they are still trying to figure out why her English is so appalling, so I guess it's a moot point.

Contessa: Wow. I have been hearing about the "distance" between them and only seen a few clips here and there and numerous non-interactive shots of the two, but this is the fist time I have actually watched a clip of this length. Your assessments are spot on (though it looks like he was doing the ringing). Mary looked lost, and uncomfortable. She also looked rather prim (the way she sat), and she did not even seem to know/understand what was going on in the game. Was that her lady-in-waiting beside Frederik? If so, why wasn't she sitting beside Mary? Mary was ignored by pretty much everyone, even when they were walking out of the stadium, but especially by her husband (I'd be ticked off). Could it be that she had previously made it known that horseriding and golf were her only passions, so no-one thought that she would care?  :unsure:

Fred looked faintly irritated, like he felt that he was being policed by his wife. However, I have seen a photograph somewhere of the same event, where he appeared to be showing her the telephone, perhaps a text message. Doesn't paint a very rosy picture of married life, does it? Poor thing. Perhaps they both need to sit down and talk things through, before they deteriorate any further (I mean, when she held on to his arm, it looked like he wanted to shake it off).  :thumbsdown:

Elise, they wouldn't be tired because of the children, because no matter what grand PR pronouncements have been made, it is the nannies (yes) who do all the work. That video shows pretty much how things have been for much of the time. It's a shame. But I hope they work it out. They made their bed, now they have simply got to lie in it. I bet the Queen has already told them that as well!

[dizzylizzy13]

Well, at least in the video they don't seem to be having much fun together IMO. Tigers don't change their stripes and if Fred was a womanizer prior to his marriage, his wife might still feel very insecure, which is how Mary often looks these days. She looks very clenched and "on" which does not help anything, and I think he looks nervous about something.

If they are having problems, I do hope they work it out esp. as they have children. Marriage is a rough road (trust me! :D) and at the end of the day a marriage can only be as happy as the two people in it -- let's hope they find their path to contentment and happiness :flowers:

[Countessa]

It's like just in the last few months Frederik has checked out emotionally leaving Mary to hang on the best way she can. I wonder what she thought about the revelation that he sees old girlfriends for "chats"? Maybe she already knew this. Maybe Fred thinks she leaked it to the press somehow. There is something off here all of a sudden. I wonder what happened.

[Lillianna]

Unfortunately, this has not happened all of a sudden. What you've seen in the video is pretty much how it has been on and off since right after the honeymoon. In fact, there was plenty of evidence to suggest that it was like that between them before the wedding... and gives credence to the persistent stories that Frederik was actually on the verge of dumping her (or had in fact done so), before the engagement was announced. Something is off between the two... and with so many people (from their ranks) expressing concern about them, it's perhaps only a matter of time before Trine Villemann gets a few more scoops.

I would dare to suggest that at the root of their problems lies the issue of trust. Mary knew exactly how Frederik was before she married him. It's not as if he tried to hide it. But something must have happened to make him change his mind about her, and I don't just mean the dramatically new person that she became. Even if it was a marriage under pressure, the fact is that he made the decision. And like it or not, he is stuck - tied to her forever, in a sense - since Mary made sure to have two children in quick succession after the wedding. I am guessing that there was one revelation too many in the culmination of post-nuptial revelations. And trust is a very fragile commodity. Once damaged, it takes serious work to fix it - if at all. Either that, or they just no longer click, but I find hard to believe that it is that simple. This has been going on for far too long. When someone checks out emotionally, then it is a sign of a very serious problem. But it can't be one person's fault. It takes two. Let's hope they grow up and work it out, regardless of what the end result becomes. Better now than 5 years from now. And I seriously hope that Mary does not go the route of so many other women, by trying to have another baby to buck up a lull in the marriage!

[Berlin]

Why did Frederick cry at the wedding?  Was it because he was happy or that he was sad that he was stuck with her?  I just think Fred realized that she was a golddigger before they got married.  And I wonder why they were so quick to get a post-nuptial agreement from her.  I can't wait till Trine's book comes out in English. 

[Anyasha]

Lilliana, I have not seen any of what you're describing. I'm not saying it's not there, I'm just saying that I never noticed it. If what you're saying is true, that's very very sad, because I always liked this couple. :( Hopefully they can work things out if they need to.

[dizzylizzy13]

If Mary was a golddigger, she went digging in the wrong place -- I think the DRF are relatively cash poor? :shrug: The castles and jewels are not things that can easily be liquidated, plus she had to sign a pre-nup from what I've read.

If she was guilty of anything, I think it was probably more of being in love with the idea of being a princess and living happily ever after.
What woman hasn't dreamed or hoped for that? No matter how fine a prince (or Prince) you marry, there is always the day-to-day boringness of life to contend with later on ... perhaps that's all she/they are going through?

[Countessa]

I think they were very in love when they got married and continue to be, for the most part, happily married. I think Frederik is restless and doesn't have a long attention span and that's why he's often out with the boys or sailing while Mary is at home taking care of the children. She also seems to do almost all of the royal duties with Frederik sliding by without doing much. I still like them as a couple and hope they remain happy and connected.

[serene grace]

Wow..this recent news reminds me very much of the stories about Diana and Charles at about the year 1987-88....the children were born, Diana was adored by the press, but they thought she had become obsessively concerned with her image, her weight, her dresses. The press even wrote she was spending too much on clothes and only focusing on superficial things like the camera or hugging people for a good photo. Charles was getting called inattentive for focusing on gardening(and other things we found out later) and ignoring some of the flashier Royal outtings , he hated film premieres and Diana would go alone or Charles would go and look miserable. 
That said.....I think the Mary and Fred will weather their problems, because Fred was so deeply in love with Mary on their wedding day and during the courtship, anyone could see that. Mary loves him and her role as Crown Princess, neither party will let their marriage go, because of a few months of strife in the relationship. I think these two love each other deeply and will work on any problems they have.  :shrug:

[Lillianna]

I don't think that there are many serious watchers out there who are still convinced that it was "the match" of a lifetime, i.e., that it was based on love, rather than on convenience. She was in fact headed back to Australia when the engagement rumours reached fever pitch in what was an abrupt turnaround.

I liked them as a couple as well, but after I watched the engagement interview and the pre-engagement images of Mary's head swivelling to catch the cameras wherever she went, coupled with the expression of rapt excitement, I had several moments of clarity and began to get a feeling of unease. It was just a bit too perfect, the set-up. Something was not quite right. (I get the same feeling when I observe Kate's numerous antics, incidentally).

The giveaways were there in the engagement interview. Every woman loves to recount the way her beloved proposed to her. Even though it was known that it happened in Rome, she refused to say anything more than "it was a normal proposal" (primly). Totally without enthusiasm. I mean, she literally brushed the topic aside, on international television. It was Frederik who later gave more details as to the run-up to the proposal. But the clincher was when she said "we had got to a stage where a decision simply had to be made", etc. I could accept the bit about the meeting of the minds. But there was nothing about LOVE in those declarations before the nation and the world, and their body language spoke volumes. Zero interaction. They were like two strangers, despite the fact that they had been having an intimate (physical) relationship for nearly four years (contrast that with the body language between Mathilde and Philippe and between Máxima and Willem-Alexander at their engagement interviews).

Fred cried because he was overwhelmed by the occasion. He said as much in an interview afterwards. He had never actually expected to see himself in that position (just yet, :) ). But it had to happen some time. And he is an emotional guy. (He is in fact a dead ringer for an ex of mine, also Danish, right down to this emotional side, but I digress).  :teehee:

I think they were attracted to each other in the beginning and must still care for each other to some degree. Scandinavians are very pragmatic people and don't get all hung up on the concept of undying love. Many of us are not above making the best of the situation we've got. I think it is the same with Mary, which is perhaps why the marriage happened at all. She was certain of what she wanted and she got it, it just has not turned out to be the bed of roses or easy ride she thought it would be.

At the moment, Frederik looks trapped and henpecked. And Mary looks to be deeply insecure and uncertain. This can make her seem downright phony at times. But in time, I think/hope that they will learn to trust each other (again) and grow closer to each other and each get their priorities straight, so that they do not end up leading separate lives.

[serene grace]

But.....do you think the Queen would permit a seperation/divorce if it ever(heaven forbid) came to that. I think Fred loved Mary deeply, I don't know if he is that good and actor. I wish them the best. They just looked so in love to me(maybe at a distance here in the US viewing clips from the wedding, I was just naive) But he did look so in love with her.
I hope it never gets to the divorce stage, that would be awful.

[dizzylizzy13]

Scandinavians sound a lot like some Northern Germans I know :)   

Seriously, I do agree with the point about them being pragmatic ... as much as we like to think of love (at least in popular culture) as that warm n' fuzzy thing we (hopefully) feel at the beginning of a relationship, the reality is that feeling does not last beyond a few years. Yes, it often grows into something quieter and sturdier, but usually less obvious or outwardly glamorous.

When I see Mary or others suffering from their fairytale letdown, I always think of that saying: Be careful what you wish for. Sometimes having a dream is much nicer than attaining it. :flowers:

[serene grace]

I still haven't gotten over the announcement in Parliment that The Prince and Princess of Wales would separate, but there would be no Divorce! Talk about Fairy Tale letdown, :cry: :cry: I'm the worse when it happens. :lmao: :windsor1: :lmao:

[Elisevonblah]

It was Frederik who later gave more details as to the run-up to the proposal. But the clincher was when she said "we had got to a stage where a decision simply had to be made", etc

Didn't Mary say that about moving to Denmark, not the engagement?