How The Duchess of Cornwall Won Our Hearts

[HistoryGirl]

I've thought about this a lot. Personally I see that it is a matter of how much you value trust and loyalty in a relationship. For some reason, the upper classes don't seem to think it strange to have mistresses (probably because they oftentimes marry within their own small group). 

I try to put myself in Diana's place and how I would feel about such a situation. Now to me, there is absolutely nothing worse in a relationship than cheating, I agree with SophieChloe; it's disrespectful, hurtful, and disgusting to me ‎because once trust is lost in my mind, nothing can be salvaged. But then I think, that idea comes from how I was raised and what I've observed so it's totally biased. 

I wish I did know the details of Charles and Diana's early marriage because who cheated first might help me make a decision on how to feel about both, but of course I don't. It is interesting because Diana was from the aristocracy so she must have known that it happened. Maybe it was just too much for her. And from my own personal, totally biased opinion lol, I think good for her for not taking it. But overall, I'd say that whether Camilla has "won your heart" or not depends on how you yourself view infidelity and whether it's a total dealbreaker for you in a person. ‎
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[Macrobug]

No, they shouldn't have had an affair.  But it's now almost 20 years since Diana and Charles divorced, and Charles and Camilla have been married for 9 years.  I think they, Will and Harry, and everyone else are entitled to move on at some point.

I feel that if the parties directly involved are able to move on or at least give the appearance that they have, then the rest of us bystanders should be able to also.

[sandy]

Charles and his minions have not "moved on" even this year Diana got put down by Charles cousin in an interview. They are not going to let go of the negativity about Diana. I believe Charles and Camilla are not the least bit sorry for what they did regarding Diana. Camilla apparently thought it OK to "honor Diana" at the Memorial Service.



History girlDiana went into the marriage in good faith. She had no lover watching her get married. Charles told his biographer he was involved with Camilla ca. 1979-80 when she was married to someone else. He decided he wanted heirs and I think he had every intention of keeping Camilla as his "friend." He passed off Camilla to Diana as his safe married friend and apparently Diana thought her harmless because she went with Charles for weekends with the PBs. She also was escorted by Camilla to polo matches and other events. Camilla "advised" her. I think Camilla was in it for herself and enjoyed being the mistress of the Prince of Wales and was not about to give it up. She was according to various sources not totally out of Charles life after he married Diana. Diana was hurt because Charles confided in Camilla and Charles even admitted he preferred Camilla when he married Diana--this was in the 1994 Dimbleby book. I call that cheating. If a man cannot commit he should not marry. Charles had his own "rules."

Diana had two children with Charles and there were no more children. Diana wanted more children. Diana said he went back to his lady after Harry was born. Even if he didn't sleep with her he abandoned Diana. Edward VII although he had mistresses did not leave his wife's bed. Nor  were the mistresses permitted to undermine the wife or take over any of her hostessing duties. Camilla did that and more--she went to Stuart Higgins to give her side of the story. Camilla was IMO slick and manipulative and got what she wanted by this behavior.

Diana did not cheat first IMO. She was more or less ousted by Charles even though they kept up appearances in public and shared parenting of the two boys.

I do think it is a form of abuse for a husband to cheat. And I read in several books that Diana treated Diana with more contempt after he went back to Camilla. Some men feel guilty and buy the wives presents and are nice to them out of guilt. But Charles put down Diana in public and gave Camilla the jewels and Diana the paste.

Early on, IMO and those of some authors,Diana and Charles had a chance to work things out. But Charles because Diana was so popular wrote whining letters to his friends and being sycophants and thinking themselves "loyal" put down Diana. From then on it was a downward spiral.

[Canuck]

I feel that if the parties directly involved are able to move on or at least give the appearance that they have, then the rest of us bystanders should be able to also.

This sums up my feelings on the issue.   :thumbsup:

[sandy]

Nobody knows the thought processes of those involved.

Everyone is entitled to an opinion no matter how those involved behave in public.

Diana and Charles put up appearances for years and the public was none the wiser.

[amabel]

I wish I did know the details of Charles and Diana's early marriage because who cheated first might help me make a decision on how to feel about both, but of course I don't. It is interesting because Diana was from the aristocracy so she must have known that it happened. Maybe it was just too much for her. And from my own personal, totally biased opinion lol, I think good for her for not taking it. But overall, I'd say that whether Camilla has "won your heart" or not depends on how you yourself view infidelity and whether it's a total dealbreaker for you in a person. ‎
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well since Diana had an affair with a married man, Oliver Hoare, and a flfirtaiton with another, she was hardly innocent of damaging other people's marriages

[SophieChloe]

^ She was free to do so.  Her husband and his mistress were filling their loins....

[amabel]

She was free to hurt  other peoples wives, but Cam was wrong to hurt her....

[sandy]

Talking about Diana's liaisons does not make Camilla right. The Hoares are still together. Whether or not there was a full blown affair between Hoare and Diana is subject to speculation. Jephson wrote he did not know the nature of their relationship. Hoare is not going to talk about it and Diana is dead. It's beating a dead horse to bring up Diana to try to whitewash what C and C did. Had Camilla not been around and Charles dumped her I doubt Diana would have looked at another man.

Camilla was in the drivers seat and it was not just an affair the woman manipulated things to her advantage and undermined Diana every step of the way even from the get go when she sent Charles gifts on his honeymoon with Diana. 

[HistoryGirl]

I wish I did know the details of Charles and Diana's early marriage because who cheated first might help me make a decision on how to feel about both, but of course I don't. It is interesting because Diana was from the aristocracy so she must have known that it happened. Maybe it was just too much for her. And from my own personal, totally biased opinion lol, I think good for her for not taking it. But overall, I'd say that whether Camilla has "won your heart" or not depends on how you yourself view infidelity and whether it's a total dealbreaker for you in a person. ‎
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well since Diana had an affair with a married man, Oliver Hoare, and a flfirtaiton with another, she was hardly innocent of damaging other people's marriages

I never said she was. I was specifically speaking about the situation with her, Camilla, and Charles since the thread is about Camilla winning hearts after that situation.

[SophieChloe]

She was free to hurt  other peoples wives, but Cam was wrong to hurt her....

IMO she would never have done so - if not for C&C's carrying on. 

[sandy]

Diana went into the marriage in good faith. Charles did not and he told his true feelings to his biographer years later.  Diana was an innocent at the outset. Diana was cut loose by Charles after she had the requisite heir and spare. Camilla was said to have told Charles no more children with Diana and I can believe that.

Camilla should have backed off if she had had a shred of decency.

[Canuck]

I think the point people were making in mentioning Diana's affair with a married man is that it's not quite as simple as "Camilla had an affair with a married man, so she is irredeemably terrible forever."  No one is saying what she and Charles did was okay.  But people who do bad things are not necessarily bad people, and you can admire someone who did a bad thing years ago for things they've done since.

[sandy]

It was a lot more than just an affair. Camilla wanted it all and saw to it that she got it. It was not just sex it was being able to maneuver and manipulate. She reminds me of Wallis Simpson since she was manipulative and could push the right buttons with the Duke. But that said. Charles did not have the be all end all love--he had nothing to lose or sacrifice and got his heirs from his unfortunate first wife so they can all be happy with Camilla or so some of his fans say (not singling anybody on the board out I read this in the media)--the Duke gave up being King to be with her. Charles never pursed Camilla as a possible wife  way back when even telling her to wait for him when he went to sea. I think it was a bad thing that Camilla undermined the wife going to Stuart Higgins and also playing hostess and redecorating Highgrove when Diana was away. None of Edward VII's mistresses would have dared trash the wife much less taken over hostessing duties at the wife's home.

It was a lot more than an affair. And the proof is Diana was out and Camilla now grins like a Cheshire Cat and has it all though she was not considered good enough apparently to have royal children (by Charles).

[HistoryGirl]

I generally tend to agree but it's all a matter of perception and how much infidelity means to you and how easily one can forget that. I can't judge people who say that they can't get over what Camilla did because I'm the same way when it comes to cheating. The same way I can't judge people who have moved past it because the way they view people is different. I don't think it makes either side wrong, just different.

[sandy]

Charles did not do right by Diana. He should have not let the mistress show disrespect for the mother of his children. It was more than cheating it was her active undermining of Diana. I still don't think C and C have moved past it I think they both feel they did nothing wrong and it was all Diana's fault. Charles never took any responsibility for the breakup and neither did Camilla.

[Trudie]

I wish I did know the details of Charles and Diana's early marriage because who cheated first might help me make a decision on how to feel about both, but of course I don't. It is interesting because Diana was from the aristocracy so she must have known that it happened. Maybe it was just too much for her. And from my own personal, totally biased opinion lol, I think good for her for not taking it. But overall, I'd say that whether Camilla has "won your heart" or not depends on how you yourself view infidelity and whether it's a total dealbreaker for you in a person. ‎
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well since Diana had an affair with a married man, Oliver Hoare, and a flfirtaiton with another, she was hardly innocent of damaging other people's marriages

ll

Diana, Oliver Hoare or even Diane Hoare never admitted nor spoken about an affair and the Hoare marriage is still intact so throwing dirt on Diana to excuse the behavior of Camilla is really in poor taste when one considers that Diana is dead and all these so called lovers she supposedly had, have had almost 17 years to speak out. There has never been any proof provided that this so called affair ever happened only gossip. Charles admitted to loving up Camilla.

I think the point people were making in mentioning Diana's affair with a married man is that it's not quite as simple as "Camilla had an affair with a married man, so she is irredeemably terrible forever."  No one is saying what she and Charles did was okay.  But people who do bad things are not necessarily bad people, and you can admire someone who did a bad thing years ago for things they've done since.

So What exactly have they done since?

[Queen Camilla]

The last 7 pages should be deleted as all are off topic.

I only hope the moderators would enforce the rules.

Thanks :ugh: :orchid:

[Trudie]

^ Could it be because the posts are truthful and not evil fiction that was found in another thread. Sorry but it seems you want rules enforced to suit you and obviously these posts are relevant as to Camilla winning peoples hearts.

[Windsor]

[admin]We must allow threads to develop, in doing so we will see a divert onto other related topics as the thread develops.[/admin]

[Queen Camilla]

How is Diana's &  Tiggy Legge-Bourke relationship have anything to do with the topic "How Camilla won our hearts".

On one page Tiggy Legge-Bourke is referenced 52 times.

[Trudie]

So why does it bother you Queen Camilla Tiggy was not liked by both Camilla and Diana and has more to do with a surrogate role played out by both Tiggy and Camilla.

[cate1949]

she hasn't won my heart - I accept she "won" and she will be Queen.  When she does something positive I will acknowledge it.  But she is not winning my heart. 

[HistoryGirl]

^ That's the way I feel about it as well.

[amabel]

She was free to hurt  other peoples wives, but Cam was wrong to hurt her....

IMO she would never have done so - if not for C&C's carrying on. 

that's hardly the point.  the fact that she had bene hurt did not give her the right to hurt others